Cranky Crone News

I used to say, “I am a child of God, a wife and mother , and an educator.”  My life is so much more, now.  A child of God – yes.  A widow and mother with two living daughters (one daughter’s life was taken by a brain tumor), a mother-in-law, and a grandmother of two girls – young women, actually; Grand #1, red haired like her mother, a math whiz, a poet, and musician; Grand #2, brown hair like her father’s, also a poet, musician, and a computer whiz.  A sister (we’re the last two of our generation); and, an aunt of some relatives I don’t even know.  I realized the other day that this makes me the matriarch of my family.  I am an educator – still.  But more, much more.

There has been a lot of talk about immigrants, during this past year.  It continues, today.  I thought I’d take a look at how immigrants to my country have affected my well being.

Every New Years’ Day, we often think about our blessings.  Those that we know we have received.  And, maybe, those that have been ignored.  I know that I’ve been told y’all before that I do feel blessed with the family and neighbors and friends that surround me and make my life special.

It is year’s end.  So, this is short.  I hope you all have a blessed Christmas.

 As my age begins to increase, I find that I’ve been thinking more about how my goals are changing.  Or, not changing.  Do all older people find themselves in this situation?  Do we rethink our lives and, as that saying goes, regret those things more that we didn’t do than those that we did?

I am so excited about this that I know of no other way of presenting it, except to use the information from an article published by the Denver Gazette.  I have the Gazette dropped into my e-mail box every day – sometimes, many times a day, depending on the “breaking news” of that instant.

If I am correct, Noah Festenstein wrote the article:  “Will human eye transplants make the blind see? CU Anschutz Medical is exploring the possibility.”  I have taken information from this article without hesitation.  I could not paraphrase and make it better.  I know that this borders on plagiarism, but I figure that this once, it’s okay; and Noah gets the credit for the research and writing.  Everyone needs to know this information.  And, if you want to read more than I can provide, look it up.

I’ve just come home from having a delightful dinner with neighbors, Rita and Tasha.  After our delicious repast, we watched a movie, “White Bird.”  It is a new movie starring Helen Mirren and others.  I think she is one incredible actor and, so, was pleased to be in the audience.

As usual, I was thinking the other day about my life and what has occurred in the course of eighty-six years.  In that time, I’ve been allowed to enjoy a host of happiness.  And, of course, some sadness.

I’m learning how to let go of things that have occupied my being since I was a young child.  “Letting go” can be, in many ways, cathartic for most people.  Myself, included.

I can’t say that I remember a whole lot about being a child.  Maybe, that is good, because what I do remember isn’t always pleasant.  I’m sure there must have been pleasantness in my young life – I just don’t remember those times.  I often think that if I could just put those unpleasant memories in a balloon and let them float away, that would be best.  Now, I say, just stop remembering the unpleasant.  Remember the pleasant – no matter how few those times are that can be remembered.

As a teenager, my memories were of going to school, going to work at the library, and going home by eight in the evening and studying for the next day’s school work, finishing anything that I had not accomplished on the bus ride to work and home.  Sister Clara says that I was always reading, as well.  I do remember reading, but never know how much.  I think that of all of those activities during those years, the best was going to work at the library.  I loved library work; and I still do.  I suppose that’s why my personal library collection numbers somewhere between two and three thousand volumes.  And, our boss, Miss Knox, ran a library for a city’s population of about 180,000 souls with three adults and the rest of her staff of high school and college kids.  And, ran it well.

Miss Knox was an incredible mentor.  She and my high school librarian were important figures in my life at that time.  As I think about it, I now realize that my mother Hazel was also one of my mentors.  Without saying it, she taught her daughters to be strong, independent, and capable people.  She had had many disappointments in her life; yet, she instilled in the five of us the will and know-how to get things done.  Her influence is definitely a memory worth keeping.  Then, of course, at almost ninety, she left us.  Letting go of her influence was difficult, although we know we’re are stronger because of it.

At the time our mother passed, we still had most of our families intact.  For me, in subsequent years, I lost and had to let go of my husband, a daughter, parents-in-law, a beloved brother-in-law, sisters, neighbors – I could go on but won’t.  Letting go of these individuals is painful.  We all need to recover and continue living.

And, then, of course, there are the pets we have lost.  In most cases, they have also become family.  So, we release them because we know it is not kind to keep them alive and hurting just because we love them.

This week, I had to let another thing in my life go.  For more than thirty years (on and off), I have been an International Lion.  I became a Lion when I was the school superintendent in a small district on the Eastern Plains of my state.  As was generally the thing in those days, I was the only woman in the club.  When I left the school district to return to the university, I transferred to a club in a small town near the university, even becoming the president of that group.  But, due to extenuating circumstances, I was president at the time that the club disbanded.  There was a several year hiatus in my membership, until a friend invited me to become a member of my current club.  Now, several years later, I find it necessary to leave that club; again, what seems to be extenuating circumstances have caused my departure.  This “letting go” has been difficult for me, but as I said in my letter of resignation, I’m not willing to be a “half member,” any longer.  And, so, as much as I will miss this group, I have now let go.

We usually think of Thanksgiving as a time to be thankful for those things that we have been given.  Maybe, Thanksgiving is also a time to think it is time for letting go.  Sometimes, it seems that we need a thump on the head to realize we must continue our lives to do those gifts justice.  And, we should be grateful.

My hope and prayer for you is that you have a peaceful and blessed Thanksgiving of 2024.

Be Safe and Be Well
The Cranky Crone
Thoughtful comments are appreciated.

Several years ago, at a time that I needed help with putting books, papers, things in order, Daughter #1 told Susan about my need, and it was arranged that she would come to work with me.  Apparently, she had serious trepidations about working with me.  

Today, as I was checking out my purchases at my local craft store, I saw that the young woman who was checking me out had tattoos on her arms and upper chest.  I told her I wished that she and I had more time because I would like to ask her about her beautiful tattoos.  I told her that I planned to write a BLOG about tattoos.  She seemed pleased.