My 2023 Valentine

Dear Readers, I was going to write something completely different for this week.  Then, I realized that the real topic should be Love.  For most people in the United States (if not the world), love is the topic of discussion, this week.  Either experiencing expressions of love, or not experiencing expressions of love.  In the U.S.¸ we do make a big production of this thing.  Cards.  Flowers.  Chocolate.  Romantic dinner.  All things Valentine.

SO, THIS IS MY VALENTINE

TO

MY FAMILY, FRIENDS, AND READERS

It occurs to me that all love is not romantic love.  There are other kinds of love.  We all know about the love for children; we hope – and pray – that all people who have children love them!

Brotherly love.  Does this include neighbors, friends, acquaintances?  Even people we don’t know but are drawn to because of their situations – safe, cautious, precarious, dangerous.  Those who are in harms way?  Somehow, I think we want to wrap those people in a protective love – whether we know them or not.

 Cards.  Yes, we send cards and receive cards.  I’d like to share some of the cards I’ve received over this past year.  First, I’d like to share a card received last Christmas.  You know that I am privileged to take care of two dogs whose moms and dads have occasion to be away from home – Kate (a beautiful, smart Border Collie) and Paisley (a sweet and beautiful Australian Shepherd).  Their “parents” are always kind; such as at Christmas, Paisley’s mom and dad sent a card, signed:  “Love, Paisley, Marjie, and Joe.”  Katie’s mom and dad always give me a card, signed:  “Love, Katie, Keith, and Rita.”  I can tell you that whenever I have these dogs, I feel reciprocal love; you see, I believe that dogs can exhibit love, just like people can.  I know that my dog Lady loves me.

Just today, I received a Valentine from Daughter #1.  It is the beautiful heart-shaped, hand made Valentine, above.  In the pocket is another handmade card with “Happy Valentine’s Day … H … written on it.  Daughter #3 sent a card with the figure of a woman on the front and a sign that reads “you are one of the strongest women I know.”  Hand written inside is:  “Mom – This is a love note from me to you.  I am proud to be your daughter.  Thank you for all you have done for me, [and my family.]  Love, … J…”  These cards make me feel exceptionally loved.

Of course, there is love all over the television.  Especially, the Hallmark channel.  Even though the stories in the movies are predictable, they are quite enjoyable and loved by many viewers.

Friends also share their love.  I have a good friend Lois who sent a card with a wonderful and comforting note.  When I am with Lois, we spend our time laughing.  Really laughing.  There is always something that triggers our laughter.  The front of the card says:  “Life has already given us the most perfect gift,”  Inside, she wrote, “and, that gift is each other!”  What a great thought!

And, then, thinking about love always brings me to the love of my life.  More than sixty years ago, this freshman college student needed help in the Western State College library.  That was my Saturday to be in the library, and I was working at the desk; so, it was my job to help customers.  I was also a freshman, but I’d worked in libraries since I was in high school – the high school library and the public library in my town.  So, I offered assistance, helped him find what he needed, and went about my other business.

The story, as he told me later, is that he went from the library to the student union where he met a couple of friends.  According to his telling, he told them that he’d met the woman he was going to marry; his friends did not approve.  (I often wondered any of this story is true.)

I didn’t think much about the encounter until he approached the table in the dining hall where my roomie and I were eating, saying, “You’re in the show on Friday – right?”  I was in the chorus of the operetta (Of Thee I Sing) that Friday and said so.  Then, he said, “I’ll pick you up, and we can go to the student union after the play.”  Now, I can tell you that may be the only time in my life that I was speechless.  Having heard no rebuttal, he apparently decided that I was willing to join him after the performance.

Friday came and I KNEW that John (another cast member) was going to ask me to go with him.  I just knew it!  So, I decided that I would go with him.  Then, came the end of the performance and, for some reason, I couldn’t go with John.  Rather, I went with Larry.  And, the rest is the proverbial “history.”  We dated during the rest of our freshman year, and even talked about marriage.  At that time, men who were not twenty-one years old were required to have parental permission to marry; but, not women – go figure.  He was eighteen; I was nineteen (I’m six months older than he).  We were convinced that his mom would never sign anything to give him permission to marry.

Summer came.  He went home.  I stayed at school, worked in the library, took summer classes, and, immediately after the classes ended, worked as a counselor for the college’s band camp for high school students.  As I was checking students into their dorm quarters, this tall figure stood in front of me.  Larry had traveled from his home to Western to see me!  He’d had no way to tell me he was coming – no cell phones, then.  My supervisor said I could leave my post for a while.

Larry, up to that point, was not given to “asking” me anything.  He was more of a “teller” than an “asker.”  At sometime during the afternoon, he said, “Well, are you going to marry me or not?” To which I replied, “Your mom will never sign the papers.”  He assured me that he would convince her to do so.  That same afternoon, he said we should go to a jewelers to get an engagement ring.  I’m not enamored of diamonds (to date, I do not own one), so my engagement present was a “fake fur” coat – they were in fashion at that time.  In fact, I still have that coat hanging in my front closet.  When my children came along, each one was photographed on that coat.

We were married that fall on my parents’ wedding anniversary, the 3rd of October, 1957 – more than sixty years ago; the ceremony was in my folks’ front room, surrounded by friends and relatives.  Friends and relatives that I’m sure where silently saying, “Two weeks!  I’ll give them two weeks.”  After three children, two grandchildren, and a son-in-law, he left us in July 2017, just as we were getting ready to celebrate sixty years of marriage.  We miss him, terribly.  Life was not all roses and sunshine¸ but I would certainly do it all over again in a heartbeat.

I hope your Valentine’s Day

was

everything you wanted it to be!

____________________________________________

Now, I think I will find a box of tissue and cry for a while.

Be Safe and Be Well

The Cranky Crone

Thoughtful comments are greatly appreciated.